Thank you for taking the time to read this. This will be one of hopefully many many blogs to come. In my blogs I will talk about my past, present and future, as I start my walk with Christ. I hope you enjoy.
This first blog a will give a little of my history and some. I am sure I will miss out on parts, but as the blogs and moods come, more and more sill be revealed. To start out, I wasn't raised in a Christian home, not that it was anti, my mom was a believer and my father was also, we would go to church maybe once a month, but still, what I know now of Christ, my parents were Lukewarm Christians. I never read the bible, never studied or lived His Word. I was never explained why Jesus died on our cross, how I can be forgiven for my sins, much less what a sin is and what the reprocutions were. I learned the hard way just as many have.
At 19 or so, right out of high school I got into my first serious relationship, we ended up having two pregnancies, with two abortions. After that abusive relationship, being from both of us, I started sleeping around, tolling the internet, meeting random girls and then hooking up. Along the way I stopped and got serious with s coworker. I was drinking, partying, living at home at 20, doing what society had taught me and expected of me. After breaking up with my serious girlfriend because she was too clingy, (which those who know me will laugh because I was always the clingy one) and found out she cheated on me, I soon found out she was pregnant. I denied everything, moved in with a friend I had feelings for. After my son was born, I took a test and it was positive, honestly, I have only seen him maybe 3 times his whole life. After a while of living with the girl I had feelings for, we decided to try to have a relationship. Not too long after we decided we wanted a kid, and 7 years ago my daughter was born. I was in her life since day 1, but after a while of the toxic relationship I was having with her mother, where if we weren't fighting, I was abusing her, no drugs or alcohol was involved, just pure rage and stupidity. I didn't find myself chasing women, but instead I found myself in a different addiction, and again, no drugs, alcohol, but I became addicted to World of Warcraft. Nothing else mattered, not my daughter, not a job, nothing. I was a 27 year old with no purpose, no care.
Let's fast forward a bit to now. I am now married, May 2nd will be our 1 year anniversary. Together we have 4 kids, 3 boys from her previous marriage, and my daughter, which after a long wait I received full custody of her.
That is a little about me, where I was, in the next blog I will cover some on where I am, and where I am going, and talk more about how Christ has taken me and woke me up.
I hears these lyrics today and wanted to share, by the way this will happen a lot, music is a huge part of my life, and I hear Him speaking through it daily.
*for the longest time I was livin’ blind indeed and I would only turn to God during times of need
like Dear God give me this Dear God give me that
never did I reflect on what I was giving Him back*
Jin - True Religion
Thank you and God bless.
Ryan
Beats4MyGod@gmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/#!/Beats4myGod
This first blog a will give a little of my history and some. I am sure I will miss out on parts, but as the blogs and moods come, more and more sill be revealed. To start out, I wasn't raised in a Christian home, not that it was anti, my mom was a believer and my father was also, we would go to church maybe once a month, but still, what I know now of Christ, my parents were Lukewarm Christians. I never read the bible, never studied or lived His Word. I was never explained why Jesus died on our cross, how I can be forgiven for my sins, much less what a sin is and what the reprocutions were. I learned the hard way just as many have.
At 19 or so, right out of high school I got into my first serious relationship, we ended up having two pregnancies, with two abortions. After that abusive relationship, being from both of us, I started sleeping around, tolling the internet, meeting random girls and then hooking up. Along the way I stopped and got serious with s coworker. I was drinking, partying, living at home at 20, doing what society had taught me and expected of me. After breaking up with my serious girlfriend because she was too clingy, (which those who know me will laugh because I was always the clingy one) and found out she cheated on me, I soon found out she was pregnant. I denied everything, moved in with a friend I had feelings for. After my son was born, I took a test and it was positive, honestly, I have only seen him maybe 3 times his whole life. After a while of living with the girl I had feelings for, we decided to try to have a relationship. Not too long after we decided we wanted a kid, and 7 years ago my daughter was born. I was in her life since day 1, but after a while of the toxic relationship I was having with her mother, where if we weren't fighting, I was abusing her, no drugs or alcohol was involved, just pure rage and stupidity. I didn't find myself chasing women, but instead I found myself in a different addiction, and again, no drugs, alcohol, but I became addicted to World of Warcraft. Nothing else mattered, not my daughter, not a job, nothing. I was a 27 year old with no purpose, no care.
Let's fast forward a bit to now. I am now married, May 2nd will be our 1 year anniversary. Together we have 4 kids, 3 boys from her previous marriage, and my daughter, which after a long wait I received full custody of her.
That is a little about me, where I was, in the next blog I will cover some on where I am, and where I am going, and talk more about how Christ has taken me and woke me up.
I hears these lyrics today and wanted to share, by the way this will happen a lot, music is a huge part of my life, and I hear Him speaking through it daily.
*for the longest time I was livin’ blind indeed and I would only turn to God during times of need
like Dear God give me this Dear God give me that
never did I reflect on what I was giving Him back*
Jin - True Religion
Thank you and God bless.
Ryan
Beats4MyGod@gmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/#!/Beats4myGod
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